The last three days have been a whirlwind! I have been filming with a crew for a CBC documentary on PTSD in paramedics, and it’s been very emotional. I am used to being interviewed and asked specific questions about my past experiences as a paramedic, but this documentary/interview is different because it includes my kids and AB. Yes you heard me right, after several years I finally saw the AB. We have always remained kind to one another, but lost touch after the events in my life in 2014 because well, things change, situations change, and sadly sometimes friendships change. It was lovely seeing her again – it almost felt like we picked up right where we left off, making jokes and asking about how our dogs were. Sidebar – Magyver is doing great. It was nice to have had some peaceful conversation with AB and to show her my new house. So much has changed since 2014 – but some things (like personal connections) really stay the same.
And to top the emotional roller coaster off, both of my kids were interviewed as well for the first time and hearing their input on what PTSD is, and how my sickness and injury has affected them, really put things into perspective again and ripped open a few old wounds. Hearing about how alone Caroline felt when I was at Homewood and in the hospital broke my heart. It seems like a lifetime ago that these things happened, but really they were not that long ago. They were both so young when I got really sick, and I am SO proud of their resiliency and strength through those hard times. Adam sat with cameras rolling and shared how he knows that PTSD is a ‘stress disorder’! Cue jaw drops from Caroline and I. And Caroline shared how if she does choose to pursue a life in policing that she feels stronger having been through what she has and that she would be able to use the ‘tools’ she has learned in order to maintain a healthy career. Cue tears – happy ones.
I needed a hot bath and lots of sleep the last few days to refill the emotional well that was tapped dry, but that’s ok, it has been an amazing experience for all of us and I will never take for granted how we all got to reunite in happiness and health.
The documentary will air this April on CBC. I will keep you posted with links and more details as I learn of them.